harukoraharu (harukoraharu) wrote in bujinkan,

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Dojo frustrations

It's just over a year since I formally started training in ninjutsu and I have been trying to attend more regularly.  I felt with the amount of throwing and bruises I received that breaks would be the sensible approach, while recovering and not worry too much or get too despondent about progress by going to every class.  Plus there were a lot of people I started with, existing students and beginners who have hardly been at all.  Maybe they have been on the days I haven't been :)

I know the Sanshin and Kihon Happo, though I know both need more work.  It's always good to partner with someone different for KH, it pushes me to focus on executing the technique correctly.  As one of the few girls in the class I tend to get stuck partnering the other 1 or 2 who are there on the nights I train and this does get a bit too predictable, but surprisingly not always easier.

When I was still quite new there was a guy who it was just impossible to get Musha Dori to work on.  Even Omote Gyaku was tricky as he was always resistant to every move and change in direction.  I had a partner like that, though smaller than me she made almost every technique a chore and I didn't enjoy it at all.  I know not to fall if not moved in a position where balance would be taken, just as I would always punch to the face where if not blocked I would hit you, no doubt.

I'm really annoyed.  There is a short piece about this in Simon's book and I feel uneasy about hitting someone smaller than me, and female to distract in order to get the technique to work.  There may even be a term for it that I can't remember.  I find it difficult enough in the situation with remembering and repeating the technique we have been shown to practice.  It'll be awkward if she's on LJ but it doesn't change things.  I find it embarrassing enough that it seems our Shihan only sees me messing things up.

The other main problem I have in class at the moment is my rolling is, well, rubbish.  I find myself in the position when rolling of needing to use my arm to initiate the placement on the ground for the roll and panic when only my opposite is free.  I have no space at home to practice as the rooms are tiny (converted rooftop flat) and feel a bit silly going to the small green space on the other side of my road.  The one place I could practice in class we rarely do except when the technique requires an evasive escape move.

I had hoped to go to the weekend seminar in London this weekend but feel my rubbish rolling, and that I might be that partner from hell (for someone else on the course) that I felt I'd had tonight is now making me reconsider the course and maybe even whether I'm suited for this :(
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